Saturday, 7 February 2009

Naughty Meme of Sexual Firsts

As well as tinkering with her Blogbunnie web design to keep this site up to date with all the latest technological developments, Isabella has also tagged me to do the latest of her infamous sex memes.

Here are the rules to Isabella's Naughty Meme of Firsts:

1. Please post them at the beginning of your meme.
2. Please include a link to Sex Talk For Men.
3. Also, please include as many sordid details in your answers as possible -- if you haven't got any, make them up!
4. Tag 3 people.

1. First French kiss? I'm not sure I really remember. We played Postman's Knock when we were in junior school and I can remember snogging with tongues then but whether that constitutes a proper French kiss...? I do recall kissing someone in my front porch and there were definitely tongues involved because I was experimenting but the boy's name escapes me and I'm still not sure it qualifies.

2. First boyfriend/girlfriend. The Blast from the Past (post to follow) from junior school. He disappeared suddenly when we went to senior school and then came to find me when I was 16. He and his brother had moved away with their parents and they decided to come back to visit the old area on their motorbikes. My family had moved away but he looked us up in the phone book and turned up on the doorstep. Great fun. We lost touch again until recently when he contacted me via Friends Re and reminded me that I had promised to marry him when we kissed in the woods at the age of ten.

3. First type. Not sure I've ever really had one. Guys appeal to me for different reasons, sometimes it's a physical attraction, sometimes more cerebral.

4. First time you had sex. This is a very moot point. There was the time, at 15, where, as I lay on a bed at a party in a drunken stupor, a lad tried to force himself into me even though I had a supersize tampon in the way... but does that count? Was it the Cherry Picker who actually succeeded in penetrating me and came? Or was it another boy who also contacted me via Friends Re and is under the impression that he had sex with me. A post about this is also on its way.

5. First celebrity crush. Captain James T. Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. From a very early age

6. First sexual fantasy. Being captured by bad men, stripped, restrained and interfered with. Only to be rescued by Captain Kirk.

7. First person you fell in love with.
The boy who, unwittingly, was responsible for my anorexia. I fell for him the first time I saw him on my first day at senior school and it was a crush that was to last for the duration of my life in fulltime education. I would say that I probably still carry a torch for him, even though he didn't return the feelings. We did date for a couple of weeks when I was 17 and I was devastated when he finished it.

8. First proper sex toy. The Rampant Rabbit bought for me by Little Sis. Bright pink and terrifyingly large. I'm pretty sure mine was made of see-through pink jelly because I could see where the motor later became disconnected from the moving part. I should also confess that the first thing I actually used as a sex toy was my Oral B electric toothbrush.

9. First porn video. I used to watch Bravo to try to get inspiration for my wanking. So I'd watch stuff about porn stars. Once we got broadband, I clicked on some of the clips on the MILF site but I was terrified to download anything for fear I would get caught out. The first proper porn video I would have watched with Ruf at his place. There are a couple that stick out but I'm pretty sure this one was the first. A woman being fucked by her husband on a washing machine and then turning around and the camera focussing on his rather large cock disappearing into her little rosebud arse. She then turned back to face her audience, opened her mouth and received the gentle pulses of his semen in a little gooey puddle on her tongue.

10. First sexy lingerie item/sexy briefs owned. I was never really much of a one for flimsies. I hated my body for so many years. However, if I was going out, I did still try to wear matching bras and pants and there were some pretty lacy sets from M&S. There was a pale pink corset that I bought to wear under my outfit for a party about five years ago, when I had made the decision to try to make the most of my life, rather than hiding behind baggy tshirts and leggings. I have been searching unsuccessfully for pictures. The first outfit I bought specifically to be naughty was a black basque from Ann Summers which will appear as an HNT shortly.

11. First time giving oral
. Very bad. We were at a party and very drunk. He wasn't my boyfriend, just a guy I liked. I seem to recall he made some remark about more effort, so I bit it.

12. First time getting oral. I don't really recall. I do have the memory of the guy who gave me thrush and tried to fist me. He may well have put his face in there but it's something I've always tried to block out. I do however remember more recent times and the pleasure that Ruf has given me.

13. First orgasm given by someone else
. The Cherry Picker with his fingers. OH... MY... GOD!!!

14. First one night stand.
I'm not sure about this one. The guy with the tampon happened at a party when I was very drunk but I'm not sure it constitutes a one-night stand. Perhaps my encounter with Bear would fit the bill but it still stopped short of full intercourse. As an adult female, I don't think I have ever met a guy for the first time and then gone off and had sex with them.

15. First dirty book/dirty mag read
. Men Only. We found it in an alley and it was a bit sticky and dogeared. We didn't make the link at the time but now I am disgusted. We didn't think much of the naked women, but we loved the problems page. Closely followed by the Pirate by Harold Robbins.

I tag.... Southern Girl, Redhead Editor and Benefit Scrounging Scum


Isabella Snow said...

Why am I not surprised to see Captain Kirk make this list? And LOL, the mag I talked about in my meme was sticky too! Thanks for doing my meme!

Southern Sage said...

ol@ captin kirk. I got this one too to post.

Good answer, hope your weekend is excellent.

southerngirl said...

Ironcially I too had a finger orgasm first. And I always love the Bear story. Great answers!