tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post6004961357929864087..comments2023-10-05T17:36:23.029+01:00Comments on Having my cake and eating it too: IntimacyJoanna Cakehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15944673677004607976noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-8458921252137769272007-12-15T14:57:00.000+00:002007-12-15T14:57:00.000+00:00So true, so true... it is scary how fast it can a...So true, so true... it is scary how fast it can all dissolve away - like a sugar cube in hot water. The number of people walking around in this state of convenient loneliness is astounding. There is a basic human need to connect with another person on a very special level - and it seems like that is the easy part - to make the connection - but what is astoundingly difficult is to maintain thatAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-12414671162229651702007-12-09T19:54:00.000+00:002007-12-09T19:54:00.000+00:00Thank you to everyone who has commented. It would...Thank you to everyone who has commented. <BR/><BR/>It would seem that the most important thing is communication and we're all just going to have to learn from experience and never let silence ruin a relationship again.<BR/><BR/>That, combined with complacency, seem to kill a love affair stone dead.Joanna Cakehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15944673677004607976noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-14308477971374532242007-12-09T00:33:00.000+00:002007-12-09T00:33:00.000+00:00I am right there with you.I have no intimacy in my...I am right there with you.<BR/>I have no intimacy in my relationship, and we're just 2 people sharing a roof (not even a bed anymore).<BR/><BR/>Too many things destroyed it, and now .... well, medical issues keep us from ever gaining it back.<BR/><BR/>*sigh*<BR/><BR/>I need a drink now ....<BR/>Let's get pissed and bring out the toys!<BR/>THAT'LL get the party in full swing! ;)BlazngScarlethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09240507708999563717noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-85676749950467769632007-12-08T23:14:00.000+00:002007-12-08T23:14:00.000+00:00I think this is quite a beautiful post, pithy even...I think this is quite a beautiful post, pithy even. It works on different levels.Shanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07827981433386542298noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-19683807929523678632007-12-08T21:31:00.000+00:002007-12-08T21:31:00.000+00:00Silence, that kills the marriage. When the two peo...Silence, that kills the marriage. When the two people stay in their own heads. Toys are something to fill a gap.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Not that kind of gap.Old Knudsenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05939476225847425724noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-78295065851490608532007-12-08T21:07:00.000+00:002007-12-08T21:07:00.000+00:00I'm not sure if using your tooth brush was the rig...I'm not sure if using your tooth brush was the right approach. That isn't even a real attempt. That's like sticking a chop-stick in a jelly jar.Upset Waitresshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07389216893210851274noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-71601531110704323062007-12-08T20:22:00.000+00:002007-12-08T20:22:00.000+00:00I see Jetpass has the same idea as me. I just pop...I see Jetpass has the same idea as me. I just popped in to see if you would bring some of your sex toys to the party cos I need a little bit of educating in that area and I thought "who better than cake".Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14339140046788925506noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-26993983061058773112007-12-08T19:48:00.000+00:002007-12-08T19:48:00.000+00:00The greatest mountain gets eroded into a small hil...The greatest mountain gets eroded into a small hill over time as it weathers a multitude of storms and many relationships go the same way over time.<BR/><BR/>Maybe we, and I say we because i have been through a few failed relationships get to comfortable and settled into the same old rut and life gets boring and tedious causing more oif a rift than closeness.<BR/><BR/>It's part of life not Walkerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00341478577481025783noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-60927853297269205862007-12-08T19:30:00.000+00:002007-12-08T19:30:00.000+00:00Oddly enough, the intimacy didn't deteriorate wit...Oddly enough, the intimacy didn't deteriorate with my marriage. It was just everything else that did.Native Minnowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12061575657412426256noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-65884421945903223412007-12-08T19:21:00.000+00:002007-12-08T19:21:00.000+00:00I think that hardest part of my marriage ending wa...I think that hardest part of my marriage ending was that I had lost the emotional intimacy with him.<BR/><BR/>Sex is a very important part of a relationship, but If I don't feel respected I just can't connect intamately.<BR/><BR/>Happy Holiday's. See you at AB, bring some toys--they'll be interesting fodder!Michelehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00638669549487803535noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-53638120356453750952007-12-08T16:50:00.000+00:002007-12-08T16:50:00.000+00:00So true. I used to wonder when I lost it with my e...So true. I used to wonder when I lost it with my ex. I can't imagine being able to get something like that back.. do you think you will?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-90951738233585728782007-12-08T16:28:00.000+00:002007-12-08T16:28:00.000+00:00I think you're spot-on about toys, and if you take...I think you're spot-on about toys, and if you take any amount of intimacy for granted, for even a short period of time, it's likely to morph into something else entirely.2 Dollar Productionshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03757488335138920399noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-27729637787003228632007-12-08T15:00:00.000+00:002007-12-08T15:00:00.000+00:00I agree it's a very fragile balance to maintain an...I agree it's a very fragile balance to maintain and often too easy to forget that it's a priority. Way too easy.<BR/><BR/>*sigh*Jennyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11280822962202098606noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-43938360788687884542007-12-08T14:15:00.000+00:002007-12-08T14:15:00.000+00:00an all too prevalent refrain these days. Sad, whe...an all too prevalent refrain these days. Sad, when maintaining the excitement and intimacy is so very good and so worthwhileEyes of the Worldhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18179895246852273255noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-1060856073830026642007-12-08T13:34:00.000+00:002007-12-08T13:34:00.000+00:00happy holidays! glad we're at the same table, suga...happy holidays! glad we're at the same table, sugar! ;-)savannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04310843901371718758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-57456646643454500702007-12-08T11:20:00.000+00:002007-12-08T11:20:00.000+00:00Great post. I think it's true, you should never in...Great post. I think it's true, you should never introduce toys to try to improve something that is faltering, when the intimacy is fragile... only to improve something already good, when the confidence is strong.Guilty Secrethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08421149287486690752noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-17375389205933336782007-12-08T03:41:00.000+00:002007-12-08T03:41:00.000+00:00Intimacy is an amazing gift between two like-minde...<I>Intimacy is an amazing gift between two like-minded souls, but if it is not nurtured, you can lose it in the blink of an eye.</I><BR/><BR/>I think that maybe you might <I>discover</I> that it's missing in a blink, but IME it takes months or years for the intimacy to decay - because that's what it does: over time, it's not fed, not taken out for exercise, not nurtured. It withers away, until Tom Allenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04208222697436091267noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-56072061261700149462007-12-08T01:34:00.000+00:002007-12-08T01:34:00.000+00:00Ummm, I'm not too good with being serious in my co...Ummm, I'm not too good with being serious in my comments. So I'll just say, I think I agree. Maybe.<BR/>Well, yeah. I'm pretty sure, I think.Mr. DNAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07142631346143653485noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-23159849264297854232007-12-08T00:41:00.000+00:002007-12-08T00:41:00.000+00:00As I have discovered marriage or any kind of relat...As I have discovered marriage or any kind of relationship needs to be nurtured. We can't just expect to leave it alone and hope that it can take care of itself. I hope I get the opportunity to give my marriage the TLC it has been sadly missing before its too late.Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14339140046788925506noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-63998039626854141082007-12-08T00:36:00.000+00:002007-12-08T00:36:00.000+00:00Lots of things get lost in many relationships ... ...Lots of things get lost in many relationships ... I think intimacy is usually one of the first to go. Sad isn't it?Georgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14369924981153052978noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-52112258735524960722007-12-07T21:08:00.000+00:002007-12-07T21:08:00.000+00:00Very wise words - intimacy between two people can'...Very wise words - intimacy between two people can't be forced and its the most natural and magical thing in the world if it works!Jackie Adsheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14422573807471118887noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-24418365554077112662007-12-07T20:29:00.000+00:002007-12-07T20:29:00.000+00:00celebrated yes, but it still must be nurtured by b...celebrated yes, but it still must be nurtured by both !! For it's loss is destructive.JsTzznUhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08016812848493120973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-52739135840017945412007-12-07T19:12:00.000+00:002007-12-07T19:12:00.000+00:00Trust and intimacy are the most precious commoditi...Trust and intimacy are the most precious commodities and should be celebrated from the rooftops when two people achieve it. <BR/><BR/>You are so lucky.<BR/>pxxFire Byrdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05477692359400671374noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-88468597911296312442007-12-07T15:54:00.000+00:002007-12-07T15:54:00.000+00:00True intimacy has to be both physical and emotiona...True intimacy has to be both physical and emotional to work. I sometimes think that sex doesn't work not so much because of technicalities, but more because one, or both, doesn't care enough to make it good.<BR/><BR/>I don't get the toys/intimacy connection, though.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6493386230053818260.post-61369602128011402102007-12-07T14:04:00.000+00:002007-12-07T14:04:00.000+00:00p.s. would you be willing to update my link (if yo...p.s. would you be willing to update my link (if you like my nice girl blog ?)<BR/><BR/>Thank you !<BR/>It is...<BR/>Adventures of Loving Annie<BR/>www.lovingforyourheart.blogspot.com<BR/><BR/>if not, I'll still post occasionally (maybe once a month ? on my erotica one...)<BR/><BR/>Loving AnnieConstancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02702046097986873803noreply@blogger.com