Tuesday, 20 October 2009

Validation

'You have a hole in your heart that can only be filled by a pair of trousers. Face it, Myer, you are weak'

Edie Brit, Desperate Housewives

A woman who has to have a man on her arm.

Who has only been single for a few months of her life... and then it was because she was dumped.

A woman who views validation by a male as her whole raison d'etre so will settle for the most unsuitable model just to be part of a couple.

Who is desperate and needy.

Whose very existence must be sanctioned and deemed worthwhile by the approval of the opposite gender.

Like Susan Myer, we all need to learn to love being by ourselves.

And to appreciate our individuality for its own sake.

9 comments:

Polar said...

Thank You So much, for The Information, My FRIEND...
I'll explain later, privately...

Ben said...

A mirror image set of thought could be written about those men who need a woman for the wrong reasons: solely to assert their dominance over someone to have someone to blindly meet their needs. You can probably fill out the rest ....

Mr. Nighttime said...

"Why do we stay with lovers. we know deep down, just aren't right/Why, would we rather put ourselves through hell, than sleep alone at night."

- from "tick...tick....BOOM!" by Jonathan Larson, the playwright of "Rent"

Joanna Cake said...

Polar - Now Im intrigued :)

Ben - Absolutely! Mail order brides, sugar daddies and, indeed, abusive husbands all spring to mind.

Mr N - That's a great quote! And so very true. For so many of us, the fear of being alone is far greater than the fear that we might not be completely fulfilled in a relationship. I have often asked myself if I would have left if I hadnt already been in a relationship with Ruf. Im not totally sure what the true answer is, although I know I had reached rock bottom in terms of unhappiness in my marriage. In many cases, it takes the catalyst of a new lover to force one to analyse how truly unhappy we really are... and have been for so long.

mrwriteon said...

And we must learn to love ourselves more than any other human can, or we'll always be wanting and longing.

Gorilla Bananas said...

Only the brahmacharya is truly liberated, as Gandhi understood.

mrwriteon said...

I know males who can only find validation by the number of notches on their headboard. It amounts to a similar impulse, yet is even more shallow. Good thoughts there, but yours generally are.

Joanna Cake said...

Mr W - Definitely. But it makes us more attractive as well :)

Mr B - I had to look that up. Is it possible to be truly celibate? To not have any carnal urges whatsoever? And what strange behaviours do we exhibit if we suppress one of the most natural and strongest of human genes?

Mr W - Yup, there are a fair number of men like that... LOL, thank you, you smoothie x

MP said...

You've a good insight here. Well said, punchy and eloquent. And I'm a guy-fan of that show, too, for reasons that always elude me.